Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
