Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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