my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
My bed is full of blood and feathers
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
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