I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
