Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize