omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
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