your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I could have mohawked her pubes.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize