im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
