i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
