I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
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