Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
