we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
