Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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