CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
She even gives head with a lisp.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize
