before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize
