That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
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