I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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