I just made out with a guy for $7.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
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