all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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