I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Randomize
