He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
he just fucked me for my cheese.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
