i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
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