dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
