when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
