it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
