the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
how drunk are you?
Several
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Randomize
