I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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