im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
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