When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
