If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
