Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
He literally asked permission to hit on me
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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