those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
