Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
