Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
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