She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
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