Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Randomize
