I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
She has the best kind of daddy issues
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Randomize
