TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
