What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Randomize
