The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
