I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Let's paint friendship bongs
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
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