Sorry, I don't speak sober.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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