so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Randomize
