dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
