He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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