And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
