If i come over, it means nothing
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Randomize
