Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
