Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
