I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize
